I put the title as finals week but honestly it doesn't feel like its a finals week. I don't feel stressed man idk if its just me being lackadaisical but i feel i can B- all the subjects with this currenr effort inshaaAllah. I'll try to memorise some formulas today hopefully
I'm listening to AFTV after a draw against Sutton and i'm sorry if the frustration will inexplicably seep into the tone of this post haha. I'm not sad, i'm feeling a lot of funny emotions haha i'll try break it down
Earlier i said P was a back up plan. But hmm. From the perspective of the circumstances 2 months ago, yes P was chronologically after H. But really H was never in it with a gud shot. It's really like A, H only fitted on paper. P on the other hand i always knew ader fireworks haha may Allah swt protect us. She's a better muslim than me and a better person overall. I've made my feelings known pretty clearly to P but idk what she feels
But. Tbh i think we'll make it in the end inshaaAllah. We just need to do it the proper way you know. I want a beautiful ending, i wanna put Allah swt first, may Allah swt give us strength to do so. I wanna express myself better cause i really think P doesn't know me and she doesnt have a reason to like me if i don't express myself. I need to be a better muslim cause she is a better muslim and i want to be better.
Or. I can continue to be guarded and not myself cause i dont want things to spiral out of control either. I wanna make plans abt what to do next but inshaaAllah that'll come after finals next week, otherwise i feel like i'll be thinking with the finals bogging down at the back of my mind.
I wanna put it on record that yesterday she seemed different. Perhaps thats probably cause of the gr8 sesh FM had that evening and MM in the afternoon, and mawlid season is just smtg else. I also wanna put it on record that this has been the most blessed weeks for me cause i feel so great to be able to attend majilis everywhere and find everyone in a mawlid mood. Alhamdulillah thumma alhamdulillah.
Okay back to P. Great person, hope she passes her driving and passes her courses well. Actl i hope shes just happy lah haha im sure passing driving will be hard cause its been a while for her and passing driving in general is not ez. Hope it all turns well.
Okay away from P I NEED TO GET HER OFF MY MIND SOMETIMES okay. I hope i can pass my finals inshaaAllah. I hope to be able to go to the Zoo someday haha. I wanna be a better muslim too please
Doas doas doas.
All the best for L and A man. And for I inshaaAllah.
See ya next time m8.
